Sharing: RF’s stand on (an expensive) wedding

Copied from RF’s fb post.

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In the news today: “Half of Filipino Catholics shunning church weddings” because weddings are deemed too costly.

My wife and i got married in very simple rites. Just 1 ninong and ninang, i in a regular suit, she in a simple white dress. No grand entrances, no flowers along the aisle. The reception was in a sports club in Makati. We’ve been married 18 years, and blessed with 3 angels masquerading as children.A wedding need not be en grande to be pleasing in God’s eyes.But then again, a wedding is a once-in-a-lifetime event, and couples deserve to have their dreams fulfilled. How DO we make more couples have church weddings, then?

1. Suppliers should re-think their rates. Yeah, this would be an unpopular suggestion. But I’m not talking about those whose profit margins are barely enough to cover for expenses; i’m referring to those whose prices are based on reputation. Some will say, “but we earned this reputation and, thus, deserve to be paid as much.” I may actually agree with you. But i hope you will also remember, at some time in the past, you had done the same kind of work as a SERVICE to your couples. I hope that wedding suppliers can find this spark of “service above all”, and bring the costs down for marrying couples.

2. Churches should ALSO re-think their attitudes about weddings. Some churches consider weddings as a business and a money-making venture. I mean, Php25-40K just to allow a wedding in this or that church, wala pa dito yung “donation” kay Father? Insisting that the couple get the resident choir at Php5,000 or a fee of Php2,000 if an outside choir is secured? How about Php1,000 fee just to open the main door as the bride enters, or another Php1,000 fee to allow the use of the choir loft for a “top shot”? Oh, and how about this church that charges Php1,000 PER PHOTOGRAPHY TEAM just to shoot inside the church?

3. The couples themselves should also re-think about the essence of the SACRAMENT OF MARRIAGE, and the grace that flows from the same. It is not about the designer gowns worn by the entourage or the snazzy flowers, or the Php1,000 per plate reception food. Marriage is about 3 people — the bride, the groom and God — and that vow that will last forever.

As i write this, wifey comes along, reads over my shoulder, and reminds me that she EXPECTS to walk down the aisle on our 25th anniversary — in a designer gown, with a grand entrance in her favourite church in Alabang, with snazzy flowers by Vatel Manila and Php1,000/plate at the reception.

I guess after having to bear with me for 25 years, she deserves it.

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The last words are very sweet, it made my heart melt.
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